YouGov, the polling organisation, has finally moved on from boring politicial questioning to the issues that really matter. It’s launched a “profiler” tool, which allows you to see the personality breakdown of those interested in different things – their likes, dislikes, and their take on important issues like eating out and adverts on the side of buses.
As a result, we can finally, scientifically, reduce entire UK cities’ populations into entirely accurate one-line stereotypes.
Here’s what we found:
Londoners are basically complete wankers, who think they’re clever but actually waste their lives mucking around on the internet and preening.
People in Brighton are essentially the same, only ever so slightly nicer.
Brummies are easy prey to advertisers.
Essex people are a bit spendy and, er, “enjoy entertaining people at home”.
South Wales gave the world both The Valleys and Doctor Who, and consequently is populated by make-up clad geeks.
Newcastleites (Newcastlians?) are veggie-hating drunks.
People from Durham are misanthropic leftists.
People from Sheffield need to get out more.
Liverpudlians are constantly on the verge of losing control of their limbs.
People in cities including Manchester, Bristol and Sheffield have no noteworthy characteristics whatsoever, and consequently we assume must be really boring.
This article is from the CityMetric archive: some formatting and images may not be present.